Secret Cinema

 Queueing to get in to the IMAX at Waterloo recently, I found myself reading this poster advertsing their corporate business facilities.  'Crap slogan?' you say. '"The Modern Corporate Venue" seems perfectly reasonable.'

Well quite.  But look closer at the example photo of a business using their facilities for a conference:

ARIBALive: IT'S TIME FOR SPEND MANAGEMENT

 Captured by @falconermusic

 Jackpot!

A pair of aces

Martinair CARGO: Your Wings

 Ok, as far as logistics company slogans go, this only rates about 6.9 on the Tarbuck scale of naffness, but it's still pretty poor.  HOWEVER, they also had this absolutely beauty on the same lorry:

It takes wings to make miracles happen

  What a corker.  Who in the name of Christ thought this one up?  One for the Crap Slogan Hall Of Fame, definitely.

Slogans snatched by @falconermusic

A slice of quality

Pizza 2 Night: QUALITY MATTERS!

 Sliced by @falconermusic

 Another textbook slogan - this was one of the slogans that got us thinking about doing this site in the first place.  If you see any like this, or any other crap slogan, please send it our way.  Check out the slogan submission guidelines first!

The old one was better.

Tuffnells: ...People Who Care

  Captured by @falconermusic

  Used to be "The Lean Mean Parcel Machine".  This, though, is textbook bollocks.

Great Scott!

CONWAY: great people - great work

  Captured by @SloganHunter

  Yes, but what do they do?

Through our self delivery model, and combining our in-house Professional Services team with front line operational excellence, we inspect, design, build, produce, enhance and maintain essential infrastructure services for the community.

Well that's clear, then. I'm willing to bet these people aren't great at all. More than likely they're bullshit-talking tosspots.